but but who will protect our children

But... But... Who Will Protect Our Children From Gay Teletubbies Now???

As you no doubt have heard, Jerry Falwell died yesterday.

I come to bury the idiot, not to praise him.

Throughout his life, he had an unblemished record for being on the

absolute wrong side of any given issue. Any time he was given half a

chance, he would preach that Jesus wants you to "love they

neighbor"--- At least as long as it was the neighbor in the next pew.

"If Chief Justice Warren and his associates had known God's word and

had desired to do the Lord's will, I am quite confident that the 1954

decision [Brown v. Board of Education] would never have been made....

The facilities should be separate. When God has drawn a line of

distinction, we should not attempt to cross that line."

That stance should hardly have been a surprise. We're still talking

about the man who regularly featured Lester Maddox and George Wallace

on his "Old-Time Gospel Hour" to spread their "Christian message. He's

the same guy that constantly referred to the Civil Rights Movement as

the "Civil Wrongs Movement" (Clever one he was, eh?).

In his 1965 sermon called "Ministers and Marches", he admonished Dr.

Martin Luther King Jr. and James Farmer for supporting communism

(Which, in that day as now, was fatass white guy-speak for equal

rights) before adding "Preachers are not called to be politicians, but

to be soul winners."

Of course, that was a few years before he said "In recent months, God

has been calling me to do more than just preach--He has called me to

take action. I have a divine mandate to go right into the halls of

Congress and fight for laws that will save America."

In other words--- Ministers getting involved in the fight against

subjugation of black people = BAD. Ministers helping rightwing

politicians get elected = GOOD. Got it.

Lest anyone think he left racism behind once the Civil Rights Act

became law, he travelled to South Africa to support the Botha

(Apartheid) regime, and came back encouraging white Christians to

purchase Krugerrands to bolster South Africa's failing government,

called Nelson Mandela "pro-terrorist", and decided that he, a white

American, knew what was in the interest of black South Africans better

than the black South Africans did by declaring Archbishop Desmond Tutu

a "phony" who "misrepresented the black people of South Africa".

Because, you know, a supporter of Lester Maddox and George Wallace has

the best interests of black people at heart.

After his contributions dropped off by $500,000 in the two weeks

following the South Africa debacle, he decided to steer clear of race

politics for a new obsession---

Butt sex.

"The sexual preference of Tinky Winky..." Oh hell, I can't even type

with a straight face any diatribe that starts with "The sexual

preference of Tinky Winky". And certainly, everyone remembers Falwell

and the Beavis to his Butthead, Pat Robertson, lamenting that 9/11 was

the fault of pagans, abortionists, feminists, gays and lesbians, the

ACLU, People For the American Way, and secularists.

One thing that he said in the middle of that diatribe was quite

accurate, but not for the reason he thought it was.

"God will not be mocked".

So, who was it that really mocked God? The black Americans that

demanded equal rights under law and the right to vote? Black South

Africans that asked for the right to not be colonized into minority

rule? The gays who walk among us every day of their lives as God made

them?

Or some buffoon that never found a brand of bigotry he couldn't get

behind?

Rest in peace, Falwell. I hope when you reach your final destination

(I wouldn't lay odds on you going to heaven), that you're treated just

as you demanded the powerless here on Earth be treated.

Also see:

Jerry Falwell's Greatest Zits

On the Passing of Jerry Falwell